Kay's Key Notes

Quips, Tips and Wry Observations by Kay Frances
Funny Motivational Speaker and Stress Management Goddess

Aunt Kay’s Krazy-Good Heavenly Egg Salad

A couple of years ago, I gave both of my nieces a Dash Egg Cooker. I enclosed the following recipe for egg salad:
Aunt Kay’s Krazy-Good Heavenly Egg Salad ©
6 boiled eggs (I recommend taking the shells off). Seriously. Get your fiber elsewhere.
Put in a medium bowl. Use a knife or pastry blender to cut into very small pieces. Nobody wants to see those big, nasty chunks of egg whites. Yuk.
3 Tablespoons (-heretofore known as “T”) of Light Mayonnaise or the zesty tang of Miracle Whip. (I suppose you could use regular mayonnaise, but why add a gazillion unnecessary calories to what could actually be considered “healthy?” Save your calories for other stuff. But, don’t drink your calories. Have I taught you nothing?)
3 T. of Horseradish Mustard. If that’s not how you roll, use any kind of mustard, like maybe brown, Dijon or Grey Poupon, or plain old yellow. Any of them will get the job done, but if I didn’t think Horseradish Mustard were the key, I would’ve said any old mustard to start with. Don’t like the sounds of it? Step out of your comfort zone! Nobody ever died eating Horseradish Mustard. And, no horses were harmed in the making of this product. Trust me on this.
3 T. of Dill Relish. Non-negotiable! I can hear you now, “But, Aunt Kay, I don’t have any!” Well, get some! Don’t make me come over there.
Stir a bunch. I can’t really say what a “bunch” is. Use your instincts. But, don’t whip it into oblivion. Just until everything is nice and blended.
OPTIONAL: One 3.8 ounce can of sliced black olives. You can further dice them if you want, but really, don’t you have other things you could be doing with your life?
Some people use green olives. I say, “eewww!” but do what you want. In the end, it’s YOUR egg salad. Just don’t hang my name on some nasty concoction you come up with on your own.
A word on paprika: Some people use it. Okay, everybody does. Don’t. It’s a pointless endeavor and an unnecessary expense. Dare to be different. I mean if everybody jumped off a cliff… Don’t answer that.
Number of servings: Well, that depends on how much people eat now doesn’t it? Could be one, could be twelve. You know your friends better than I do. If they don’t like egg salad, it might be time to find new friends.
For 12 eggs, double everything.
For 18 eggs, triple everything.
Any other quantity, use a calculator. I’m an expert in egg salad, not a math whiz. What do you want from me?
Enjoy and think of your old Aunt Kay while you do. And, pick up the phone now and
then. I’m not getting any younger. 